----------------------- Page 1----------------------- Transcript from Malcolm-France PILOT TRANSCRIPT Malcolm: (TC): T e world. 196 mllon quare mle. If I covered 100 quare mle an our every our for e re of my lfe I'd ll only ee alf of . T e lef norl of my broer Reee. I queak all ng long. Tee are e freezng cold fee of my lle broer... Dewey. T my olde broer Franc. He' e one I really lke o, of coure, e go en o mlary cool. My name Malcolm. You wan o know wa e be ng abou cldood ? A ome pon, op. Lo: Malcolm, Reee, Dewey, ge n ere! Reee: Sop! Malcolm: I'm no oucng you! Lo: Tere’ only wo oaer waffle, o one of you a o ave cereal. Malcolm: I' mne! Dewey: Come on! Gve ! You ceaed! Gve ! Gve ! Hal: Hu, look a . Tey're endng an unmanned probe o Venu and leng a bunc of coolcldren name . Ta' gong o end badly. Malcolm: (TC): Tey do every mon. He a enve kn. Te ar ge cy under cloe. Lo: I alway eem lke uc a ame o ju dump n e ra. Maybe brd would lke o make ne w or maybe you boy could ue for cool projec. Arm up. Reee: Dude. Lo: Malcolm, you come rg ome from cool oday. I made a play dae for you w Seve Kenarban and you ave o ake a ba. Malcolm: Wa? Mom, no! Reee: Malcolm a a play dae?! Malcolm: Su up, Reee! Reee: W Seve 'Te Weele' Kenarban? O, man! (laug) Hal: W playng a problem? Malcolm: Fr off I don' even know Seve. Lo: I aw mom a e grocery ore, e ad you boy ae lunc ogeer. Malcolm: One me. He rolled weelcar over nex o me. I' no lke I could ay, 'Go away.' He' no even ----------------------- Page 2----------------------- Transcript from Malcolm-France n my cla. He' n e Krelboyne cla n e raler nex o eerball. Lo: You len o me, young man. Ta one lunc obvoul mean a lo o Seve. He' a uman beng w uman feelng. Now, you are gong o be frend w a crppled bo and you are gong o lke . Underood? Malcolm (TC): Ye, ma'am. Underood. If I gve up now, I won' ge e lecure. Lo: You kd... Malcolm: Damn. Lo: You ju ake your leg for graned lke nong could ever appen o em. Well le me ell you omeng. Ta ju wful nkng. Tere' menng. Tere are car accden. I could be gvng you a pankng and accdenally nap your pnal cord. Every day a loer and fr prze a you don' ave o coo yourelf around own on a kaeboard w your and. You nk abou a. Dewey: I don' ake my leg for graned, Mom. Lo: I know, oney. You're a good boy. Sop playng w yourelf. Malcolm: Sop pung me...op oucng me! Negbour: (o er grl) Go on, ju go. Lo: No, wa, wa, wa. Okay, I ran ou of am. One of you a o ave egg alad, okay? And don' dc your lle broer. I don' wan m geng kdnapped. Reee: (callng) Yea, Mom, a would be errble. (To Malcolm) I' your urn o walk w m. Malcolm: I walked m yeerda and e day before. Reee: I walked w m wen e we pan. Malcolm: Okay. Dewey: Mom ad o old and. Malcolm: Se dd no a o old and, Dewey. I'm no oldng and. Dewey: Come on, old and. Pleae? Malcolm: No! You're n e fr grade. You're oo bg for a. Look, I'm walkng rg nex o you. You'll be fne. Damn ! T w everyone eae you. Rcard: Hey, Malcolm. ----------------------- Page 3----------------------- Transcript from Malcolm-France Malcolm: Hey, Rcard. Rcard: So my mom wa ellng my dad la ng, abou your broer. Se ad e' n jal. Malcolm: He' no n jal. He' a Marln Academy. I', lke one of e be prvae cool n e counr and ' oally unfar. Everyone ac lke Franc ju bg roublemaker and e' no. Franc: Dad, I know wa you're gong o a and beleve me, I oally agree w you. Tere no excue for wa I dd. I wa doc, mmaure, oally reckle, and I'm really orry. I'm ju...I'm opng agan ope a you wll gve me anoer cance, wc, I adm I don' deerve. Bu f you could ju fnd n your ear o forgve me, I know I could earn your ru back. Malcolm (TC): I' no lke wa even our car. Dewey: Spa, Spa, Spa! Spa: (o kd) All rg, ere' ow work. You can beg for merc on your bell , lck e boom of my oe, or ake a beang. You mu pck a lea wo bu... bu-bu, f you pck ree you ge a pa for e nex wo week. All rg? Now, a' your be value. Malcolm (TC): Dave Spa. He never ge en anywere. Malcolm: Wa do you do f e cace you? Dewey: Roll n a ball. Malcolm: Wa f e ar kckng you? Dewey: Say n a ball. Malcolm: Okay. Come on. Spa: Wa. Never mnd. Teacer: Toe of you fned w your empera pan may brng your work up ere and ar on your carcoal ll lfe. You may ake wo pece of fru onl and pleae be careful w em. I boug em w my own money. My own money. Jule: God, Malcolm, a' o good. Teacer: O, Malcolm, wonderful. Te perpecve good. Te compoon clean, and even ow gn of acual ecnque. I ave o ay e g pon of my da . (laug)How' a for ad? Jule: Are you okay? Malcolm: Um, yea, I'm fne. ----------------------- Page 4----------------------- Transcript from Malcolm-France Teacer: Malcolm. Malcolm: Wa? Teacer: Tey need o ee you n e offce. Malcolm: Okay. Teacer: I nk ey mean rg now. Malcolm: Okay. Teacer: Ge up, Malcolm. (Malcolm ge up and e kd laug a pan) Carolne: H. I'm Carolne. Wan o ave a ea? Are you Malcolm? Malcolm: Ye, and I ddn' do anyng. Carolne: You're no n rouble, Malcolm. You're ere 'caue ome of your eacer nk you're, um... You know wa? I ju wan o pla ome game w you. Puzzle, uff lke a. Malcolm: Wy? Carolne: Boy, o, bo , you are a upcou lle dcken, aren' you? Now, you can look a pcure for 60 econd and I wan you o ell me everyng a' wrong w , okay? Malcolm: Te man only a four fnger. Carolne: Rg, bu me I wan you o ake your me and really look... Malcolm: Te car adow' gong e wrong wa , e eerng weel' on e wrong de, ere' no brake pedal, e word n e mrror ould be backward, e guy' wac wouldn' ay 12:00 f e' lookng a a une and I ave red pan on my a. Ta' rg. Red pan all over my a! Malcolm: Tee are good cooke. Seve: Yea... ey're good. Malcolm: So wa can you do? I mean, wa do you wan o do? Seve: I know... a joke. Malcolm: Yea? Okay. Seve: A guy...goe no...a bar...and e...a a... frog on ... Malcolm: Frog on ead. Seve: On ead. And e... barender...Wa, I crewed up. A frog...goe no... a bar. ----------------------- Page 5----------------------- Transcript from Malcolm-France Malcolm: You wan o wac TV? Seve: Can'. No allowed. Malcolm: Wa? You mean, ever? Seve: Mom ay...TV make you...upd. Malcolm: No, TV make you normal. (TC): How can ey do a? He' n a weelcar. So wa do you do all day, omework? Seve: Moly... read... comc. Malcolm: You ave comc book? (Seve weel over and open cupboard w comc book n ) Woa! You really ave Youngblood, number one? Seve: Wan o... read ? Malcolm: No way. I'd wreck . O... dd you read e la Savage Dragon wen ey pl m n wo? Seve: Yea. Brllan. Malcolm: I lke ow e never a o learn a leon or anyng. He ju ge o pound on everyone... Cu o e Wlkeron’ oue. Malcolm (TC): Saurday mornng e only ng my famly doe beer an anyone ele. Lo: (rummagng n dryer) Damn! You boy, you keep oue clean ll your dad come ome.(look n frdge) Two of you can ave lce of pzza for lunc. Te oer one can ave... I don' know. I nk ey're pea.(pone rng) Lo: Somebody ge a. Reee: No . Dewey: No . Malcolm: (anwer pone) Hello. Franc: Young Maer Malcolm. Malcolm: Franc, . Franc: Hey, man, I wroe you guy a really long leer yeerda bu, len, ey only gave me, lke, ree mnue, o would you pu e pecal proecuor on? Malcolm: Mom, ' Franc. Lo: Hey, Franc, ow' cool? Franc: O, couldn' be beer, Mom. My new roommae owed me ow o kll mce w a ammer yeerday, o, you ----------------------- Page 6----------------------- Transcript from Malcolm-France know, beween a and e general amopere of mmerng omoerocm I nk I'm really arng o urn around. Lo: Honey, ' only unl ummer. Cade #1: Come on, pu ! Cade #2: Gve up, prom dae. Franc: Yea, len, um... I know I ouldn' ak bu would you be able o end me my allowance lke, a couple of week earl ,’ caue I knd of need ome... Lo: O, my God! Are you mokng? Franc: Wa? Lo: You're mokng. I can ear you mokng. You're mokng, aren' you? Franc: Mom, I'm no mokng. Geez. Lo: Afer eeng e angu your faer and I wen roug o qu ddn' any of a reger w you? Okay, len. I'll alk o your dad. Maybe we can end you par of . Honey, I ave o go. I'm lae for work. I'll call you laer. Franc: Okay, ank, Mom. I love you. Lo: (ang up, en pree buon agan) O... I love you. (Doorbell rng) Somebody ge e door. Malcolm: I’m no geng , you ge . Reee: Su up! Malcolm: You u up! Reee: No, you u up! Malcolm: Make me! Reee: I'll make you rg- (ey ar wrelng) Malcolm: (creamng) No my face! Lo: You'd beer no be fgng n ere, Reee, Malcolm! I ad, you beer no be fgng- (Doorbell rng agan) For cryng ou loud! Reee! Malcolm!(anwerng door) Ye, can I elp you? Carolne: O. My god... um, . Hel... ello. I'm....are you...? I'm... Carolne Mller from Malcolm' cool. I en you ome leer and lef ome meage on your anwerng macne. Lo: Okay, fne. You caug me. Wa do you wan? Carolne: Um... well, ' been ree week and you aven' ----------------------- Page 7----------------------- Transcript from Malcolm-France reponded and ' really mporan...I mean, well, for Malcolm' ake a e paren be a nvolved n... Lo: So you're ere o nul my parenng kll? Carolne: No. I'm ure you're a errfc paren. (look roug wndow a boy fgng) Dewey: Wo' e baby now? Carolne: I'm ere becaue I nk a ere a remendou opporuny for...could you, you know, maybe pu a op on? Lo: Tey're ju boob, lady. You ee em n e mrror every mornng. I'm ure your are a lo ncer an mne. Carolne: Ta' acually no... Lo: Le me ell you omeng ele. Te reaon I ddn' repond becaue a load of crap. Carolne: Wa? Lo: You are no gong o ck my Malcolm n ome pecal ed cla. Wa w you people? Wy do you ave o label everybody? Malcolm may be a lle range and, I know, I know, e never u up bu e no durbed. You know, e a good boy... Carolne: Pleae! You know wa? You don' underand a all, oka ? So f I could ju come n for a mnue, I could explan everyng. Reee: Ow! Ow! Ow! Lo: Wa, wa, wa, wa. Tere' omeng we ave o alk abou. Hal: I oug we weren' gong o menon Aun Helen unl afer e bopy. Lo: I' no a. I' abou Malcolm. Malcolm: I ddn' do . Reee: Ye e dd, I aw m. Lo: A eacer from cool came b and e ran ome e w Malcolm. He a an IQ of 165. Hal: Wo? Lo: Malcolm. He' a genu. He' gong o a pecal cla. Malcolm: Wa? Hal: Malcolm' pecal? Were do you nk a came from? ----------------------- Page 8----------------------- Transcript from Malcolm-France Lo: Tey ave a pecal program for gfed cldren. Tey ave advanced exbook and devoed eacer and all or of good ng ey don' wan o wae on normal kd. You ar on Monday. Malcolm: Mom, no. I don' wan o. Lo: Wa are you alkng abou? Of coure you wan o. Malcolm: No. I wan o a n my own cla. I don' wan o be a Krelboyne. Reee: Mom, erouly, Krelboyne ge er bu kcked. Lo: Ju op one mnue. Tere' nong wrong w beng mar. And ere' nong wrong w beng cu from e erd. I make you e one buffalo a n' ere wen e Indan run e re of em off e clff. Malcolm (TC:: Hu? (o Lo) Mom, n' far. If I don' wan o go, wy do I ave o? Lo: Becaue ' no ju up o you. We ave o do wa' be for you. Malcolm: Mom, pleae! Don' make me go! Pleae! Hal: Malcolm, calm down. Malcolm: Bu n' far! Lo: Ta' rg. I n' far. I' e fr me anyone n faml a ever been gven an edge and you are no gong o wae . Malcolm: Dad? Lo: Honey? Hal: Well...look, oney...Malcolm, you ee... O, for cryng ou loud. How come ere' never any ced ea n pcer? I make a fre bac every mornng and ' gone by e me I ge ome. Malcolm: I wan a beer famly! Lo: Malcolm... Hal: Look a a. Gone. Malcolm: I don' wan o go o a pecal cla. People nk I'm werd enoug already. Lo: I know. Malcolm: I lke were I am. I wan o ay. Lo: Ta' becaue you don' underand e world ye. Sweee, lfe doe no gve you a lo of cance o ----------------------- Page 9----------------------- Transcript from Malcolm-France move up even f you deerve . Look a your dad and me. Malcolm, I'm proud of you. You boy are o lucky. You ave o many gf a oer kd don' ave. And I don' ju mean Seve Kenarban, eer. I mean, look a oe Parker boy acro e ree. Tey may be ealy, bu one o God oe are e ugle lle boy ever born. Tey look lke boled bee, don’ you nk? And oe Henderon kd? Ta elecrocued er dog wen ey were ryng o ge free cable. How mar can ey be? Ju remember, any kd wo make fun of you a creepy lle loer wo'll end up workng n a car wa. Malcolm: T ouldn' make me feel beer, bu doe. Lo: You'll be all rg, weee. If you don' make a bg deal ou of , nobody ele wll eer. Teacer: And I ju can' ay enoug abou ow proud we ould all be of Malcolm, for geng no e gfed program. Now Malcolm may no look dfferen an e re of u, bu e . Very dfferen. In bran. And I nk we ould recognze m for a. Jule: Bye. Carolne: All rgy, oday we are arng a new econ on e Peloponnean War wc I know you are all gong o love. Malcolm? Are you okay? Malcolm: U, yea. Fne. Carolne: All rg. (queezng pa uden) Excue me. Malcolm: (o cla) Sop arng a me! (o Seve) Wy do ey keep dong a? Seve: You're new. Malcolm: O, grea. So I'm e freak of e freak ow? Seve: Ju... cll ou. Malcolm: Don' ell me o cll ou. You cll ou. Nobody can lve lke . Seve: I'm okay. Malcolm: O, ure. You're okay becaue doen' make any dfference o you. You've alway been a freak. I ued o be normal.(TC): Wa. Wo ju ad a? Seve: You're gong o ake a e wrong wa aren' you? Seve: You...uck. Malcolm: (TC): Around ere, beng mar exacly lke beng radoacve. I can' beleve I'm dong . ----------------------- Page 10----------------------- Transcript from Malcolm-France Malcolm: Seve? Seve: Wa? Malcolm: Look, I, u... Spa: Score! (e and frend laug) Malcolm: Hey, Spa! Wy don' you op beng uc a buwpe?! All Suden: Oo. Spa: Wa'd you call me? Malcolm: You eard me! I don' care anymore! I ju don' care, Spa, okay? All you ever do make everybody merable! Excep for your lle monke -lave over ere. Wo, by e way, onl preend o lke you. Tey ae you a muc a everyone ele doe! And you're ju oo bu beng mean and upd o ever fgure ou! (TC): I keep ryng o run, bu my leg won' work. Mom wa rg, ey are mporan. Spa: Wow. I don' know abou you bu a Krelboyne really ur my feelng. Seve: Hey... Malcolm: Go away, Seve. Spa: I' good you wo are frend. He won' mnd arng weelcar. Malcolm (TC): Okay, were omeng good appen, fnally. So we're gong o low down and make la a long a poble. (Suden gap and ou) Spa’ frend:Dude, you a crpple. Spa: I ddn' mean o...I wan' ryng...Seve, I'm orry. Seve: Ow... aa...ow! Spa’ frend:Wa' your problem? I mean, e' n a weelcar and e a glae. Malcolm (TC): So en, e prncpal come ou, and everyone' all alkng a once. So e ory e pu ogeer a Spa aack Seve for lunc and I'm lke ero a epped n o defend m. I wa beauful. Okay, wan' funn wen Spa ared cryng. No, wa, wa. Dad' ar... ug. Yea, I know. I' gro. Bu, ey, f a bunc of brd can make e be ou of wa ey ge en o can I. Dewey: Malcolm? ----------------------- Page 11----------------------- Transcript from Malcolm-France Malcolm: Lke avng o go o pecal cla. I can make work ou, rg? Dewey: Malcolm? Malcolm: No now! (TC) Lke my famly. We're no e greae faml n e world bu we can ge beer, rg? I mean, ' no mpoble. Dewey: Malcolm? Malcolm: Wa?! Dewey: Can I ge ou? Malcolm: No, op akng. (TC) So bacally, I nk everyng' gong o be okay. Dewey: (Poundng) A bug wen up my noe. Malcolm: So wa do you wan me o do abou ?